Your Person.

We all have that one person on this universe you can share your deepest secrets with.

Your loves.

Your highs and your lows.

Your weaknesses.

Someone you would drop anything for and they would do the same for you.

A shoulder to cry on.

The first phone call you would make when you had news to share.

Your confidant, your comfort zone and your safe place.

Who is your person? Are they living or deceased?

Mine is, and always will be my Grandmother Swayngim. Even though she is no longer physically here. 4 years ago to the day, March 2nd, 2017 she left earth.

As I said in her eulogy, through the tears:

“Gram and I, we were destined to be best friends. She always dreamed of having a Rebecca. She wanted an unforgettable birthday present. So, the cosmos aligned us to the same calendar day on her 63rd birthday.”

She was not only my birthday buddy, she was my greatest friend. She called me her princess.

She had an energy about her that was infectious. She was spunky, fierce, fashionable, always had her makeup done, funny, loud and unapologetic.

She was a fighter. Gram didn’t have an easy life.

Her dad was shot in WW2 through the neck and survived. However, he passed away when she was 11 while holding her hand after saving a man from a burning building. A piece of shrapnel hit his heart and killed him.

She was hit by a metal car as a child and had multiple broken bones and a plate in her head. (Twins because I have a metal plate now too).

Her mother raised her, her sister and brother without her father. It was hard for their ends to meet.

But, she found a catch with my Pop Harry and they lived a fun, long, married life together surrounded by friends and family.

They always made the most of life and put their family first.

My Gram also lived for years against the odds. She’s where I got my grit from.

She had a stroke in 1996 and went downhill, slowly, from there with Parkinson’s disease and other medical complications.

There were numerous times where her strokes were so bad in the last 2 years of her life that we thought it was her last day.

But, she always miraculously made it and when she could comprehend what happened she would say “I’m not going anywhere”.

Those were her final, fighting words at 85 years old.

I’m not going anywhere.

She was right. I still feel her presence overwhelmingly.

The day I found out about my tumor I went and sat at her grave.

I said if I’m 1% you, I got this because you overcame so much more. I also said, I know you’re stubborn ass won’t let me see you again… yet because “I still have my time to shine”.

Her, my mom and I were (and are) thick as thieves. Mommom called us the “three best bitches”.

I will always look at the women before me, especially my mom, as strong, independent and shakers. Both of my Grams were amazing and made me who I am. Those before them made them who they are too and so on.

We live, we learn, we change and we adapt to make the world a better place that they would be proud of.

My Gram never silenced me. She always hyped me up. Sometimes too much.

She told me my leadership and intelligence will change the world one day. My gram always told me to stay on my own two feet and make a stance when I saw something wrong.

Gram would cheer for me even when I was down in sporting events. She acknowledged when I was upset and when I was happy.

She would put me in my place too when I needed it. However, she always let me learn and then gave the lesson.

She was never harsh, unless she hated an outfit. But hey, I will say I love my fashion because of her and my mom.

I know she is proud of me now and how I am handling my situation. I know she has been with me the whole time.

She cried in her urn for sure when I shaved my head because she was obsessed with doing my hair. However, I know she would of loved how I rocked it with Purple to make what could of been a bad experience good.

Gram will also yell at me once I get my tattoo sooner than later- even though it’s in honor of her.

Rest In Peace Gram! 💓